Imagining Portland Trail Blazers players as Disney+ characters

Star Wars

Rodney Hood – The Mandalorian, The Mandalorian

Believe me, it was incredibly hard to resist the urge to compare Rodney Hood to Robin Hood for their namesakes. But after taking a big discount to return to Portland, I doubt one could make an argument that Rodney is stealing from the rich. Instead, he earns a comparison to the unnamed Mandalorian from the new show announced for Disney+. If you haven’t heard of it yet, you can check the trailer out here.

The Mandalorian is a grizzled bounty hunter from the same race of warriors as the infamous father and son duo Jango and Boba Fett. He travels the universe completing contracts for financial gain. Similarly, Hood has bounced around the league as a lethal assassin offering his services to the highest bidder. But that is a lonely path to walk, and this series will give us some insight to the emotions that cross someone like Hood’s mind when he finds a suitable place to settle down.

Anthony Tolliver – Yoda, Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back (Episode V)

Be honest with yourself, they do share a vague similarity appearance-wise, right? Let’s ignore the fact that Anthony Tolliver is taller than three Yodas stacked on top one another, and they do share a few similarities beyond a physical profile. Jedi Master Yoda is said to have trained 20,000 Jedi in his lifetime. Tolliver has traversed the league and played with nine different franchises, which is about as close as you can get to training 20,000 people in the wonderful world of basketball.

Yoda is also highly respected and rarely needs to resort to battling it out to settle his conflicts. This correlates with Tolliver’s play style, who can pick you apart from deep without ever making physical contact down low in the trenches. But when push comes to shove, both Yoda and Tolliver are about their business.

Brandon Roy – Qui-Gon Jinn, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (Episode I)

To top things off here, we included a little bonus round featuring a Portland fan favorite — Brandon Roy. Although it’s been a long time since he’s actually played for the Blazers, just consider this a little cherry on top for one of the most beloved players in franchise history.

Qui-Gon Jinn was an extremely powerful Jedi and one of the most respected men in the universe, similar to Roy’s presence in the world of basketball. However, Roy never reached his full potential in the same way Qui-Gon never became a Jedi Master. For that reason, both men often go underrated in discussions about the legacy they left behind.

Qui-Gon helped take the Jedi Order to the next level by training up Obi Wan Kenobi. Similarly, Roy made Blazers basketball feel special again and was the perfect running mate next to LaMarcus Aldridge had he managed to stay healthy. But injuries would cut Roy down all too early, just like Qui-Gon’s fateful encounter with Darth Maul.

One things for sure, whether you’re subscribed to Disney+ or to watching the Portland Trail Blazers in the 2019-20 season, you’re in for some great television.