Warriors offer Brand…

Here is a math problem for you: Chris Mullin > or = Chris Wallace.

(I hope I did that right)

Originally I wanted to title this ‘Chris Mullin has lost is @#$*&#g mind’ but I opted to go the Ron Burgundy route and stay classy. The LA Times reports that the Warriors have offered Elton Brand the max.

I know right. Take a deep breath.

Stupid on so many accounts. From all the reports out there, Brand’s sole reason for opting out was because he wanted to see the Clippers sign a quality free agent. And he wanted to make sure they had the money to do so.

Baron Davis = Quality Free Agent.

So now why on earth would Elton Brand….after getting exactly what he desired and not to mention a great PG to play with…why would he leave? It’s obvious his opting out wasn’t about money. So why would he leave? I wish you had asked yourself this instead of giggling at old Run-TMC tapes.

And honestly why would you sign him anyways? Since when do you know what to do with post players? Elton Brand does not fit in Nellieball at all I’m sorry. So for what reason would you throw all of that money at him? The only reason I could possibly think of why he did this was to A) Stick it right back to the Clippers and B) save face with the fans by saying ‘See we still got an All-Star relax and forget the fact that I traded Jason Richardson for Brandan Wright and then drafted Brandan Wright’s clone’. Real mature….what is this the sixth grade or the NBA? Is Chris Mullin going to go on ESPN and say ‘He started it’? Like really?

Really Chris Mullin?!? You’re still rocking the same hair cut from 92? Really? So let me get this straight…in the past 3-4 days you have put in some John Paxson looking for a head coach type-work. First you let the heart and soul of your team opt out of his contract. Common sense says that BD opted out to get you to come back to the table with a better offer. But no, no Chris Mullin. You spit in the face of people who want to be cool. You then proceeded to casually slap him in the face. How so? Instead of making him your top priority and immediately going to talk to him…you offer the max to Gilbert Arenas. Forget the fact that the Wizards re-signed Jamison and are going to do whatever it takes to re-sign Gilbert. Forget that…you just had to pursue him while burning a bridge. Real smart.

(Why is no one making a bigger deal of this? You can’t do this? Imagine if you broke up with your girlfriend of 3 years and instead of getting the obligatory ‘omg I’m so sorry I miss you, I love you’ they say screw it and go out with Brody Jenner. Of course you’re bolting. Well some guys would just cry but you get the point)

So BD bolts to the Clippers. Gilbert is more than likely returning to Washington because they re-signed Jamison. Your coup de gras, rabbit in the hat, ace in the hole?

Offering Elton Brand. I still can’t believe it. I can just imaging you in the office with Nellie going ‘That’ll show them’ while Nellie just shakes his head and drinks some more scotch. And yes every time I imagine Don Nelson his hair is always messed up and he always scotch in his left hand. Always.