Today was the full opening weekend for the NFL..and oh my god Michael Turner just ran over someone like he was using the Truck Stick on Madden 08. Speaking of Madden 08, I love the game but sometimes playing against someone who is playing as the Chargers is annoying as hell. LT gets at least 6 yards a carry and always falls forward. And while I’m off-topic, can I get any props for the little bit of college football no-how. I called Oregon beating Michigan (not like that though), I called LSU beating VaTech and I called Washington upseting Boise State. Anyways, back to the start of the NFL season. Our picks are in and with the two Monday night games set to air let us see how we did in Week 1.
PACKERS over Eagles 16-13
Coup called that the Packers would be ineffective on offense while I said the Eagles would shut Brett Favre and the non-existant run game down. The Packers were held to 46 yards and converted only a 1/3 of their 3rd down chances. What we couldn’t have forseen was the truely “special” work of the Eagles special teams who looked like the kids who never got picked to play games in PE. All of the turnovers off punt returns kept the Packers in the game and eventually killed them in the end. I used my ‘redemption’ theme on Donovan McNabb, who promptly went 15/33 and threw for 184 yards with as many INTs as TDs. Coup, you might want to start believing in that Green Bay D as they held the Eagles to 13 points. Is Lambeau back? Lets not get ahead of ourselves. But the Cheeseheads can be joyous for 7 days. 0-0
TEXANS over Chiefs 20-3
Note to self: stop using basketball concepts to pick football winners. Mario Williams finally had a game that extended the ‘Hey maybe picking Mario over Bush wasn’t that bad argument’ from 0 seconds to at least a couple. I picked on the offensive line of the Texans. Well I guess they heard and only allowed two sacks on the day. I said who goes against LJ? Apparently anyone who knows anything about football as he had 40 yards on 10 carries with zero touchdowns. That noise you hear across the country? The screams of fantasy owners who bankrolled their squad on LJ. Until he regains his swagger I will call him Larry Johnson so the real LJ doesn’t get pissed off. The Chiefs coughed the ball up four times on the road which is just asking to lose. Schaub showed that he is just an effecient QB. 16/22, 225 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT. Not bad but it will beat the Chiefs. The question is what happens when the competition level raises up? They need another WR to step up and relieve some pressure off of Andre Johnson who made Coup proud by doing his best ‘Hello, America’ wave after a 7 reception, 142 yard, 1 touchdown performance. 0-1
(By the way, the numbers are representative of how many picks we’ve gotten right so far on the season. I of course still have zero. And while I’m sidetracked, how about that new Nike Football commercial. How did they do that? And is it really that good to have a guy who took steroids heading a campaign where he demolishes everyone in his path?)
Broncos over BILLS 15-14
Way closer than I would have thought it ever would have been. If I’m the Bills or a Bills fan I’m not too angry. Sure it was a heartbreaking loss but at the same time to come that close to beating the Broncos is an accomplishment this early. Losman was only going to be able to do so much (held to 97 yards passing) and for Marshawn Lynch to get 90 yards and a TD on the Broncos has to give them a sense of optimism. For the Broncos it was a big win in the sense that they come from behind on that last drive. Cutler could have self-destructed after his attempted pass to Selvin Young turned into a fumble that turned into a penalty. But he hit Javon Walker for a 13 yard gain and then picked up the last 2 on his own on fourth down to keep hope alive. Denver looked nasty, but how many times does Elam miss two field goals? Cutler throwing for 300+ and Henry literally running for his life combined with that D is why the Broncos will be causing problems this year. 1-2
Steelers over BROWNS 34-7
Here was the definition of a no-brainer and it did not disappoint. People need to get off Romeo Crennel’s back about the whole Brady Quinn thing. If Quinn gets thrown out in the first half of the season his career will end much like the rest of the Browns QB picks who got thrown into the fire too quick. Quinn will win a couple meaningless games at the end of the year, Crennel gets canned and the Browns renaissance begins. That’s what will more than likely happen. Big Ben had 4 TD’s but I’m going to put that on a crappy Cleveland team and not over praise him even though that was a career high. Not much else to be said except just how bad the Browns truly are. 2-3
Panthers over RAMS 27-13
“Carolina does not have enough offensive firepower to keep up with the Rams at home” is what I said on Friday. Exactly how wrong was I? If you’ve got a D that holds Steven Jackson to 58 yards, makes him fumble twice and makes a team one-diminsional you don’t really need an offense now do you? In the battle between two teams who had great hype, the Panthers came through and the Rams whimpered. Steve Smith reminded people just how good he is and Jake Delhomme smiled because now his life is twenty times easier. David Carr is somewhere relishing the fact that he actually didn’t get sacked for once. Complete breakdown for the Rams. Their biggest strength is the fact that they can run it down your throat with Jackson and then air it out. Well when you make any team one-diminsional its bad news bears. Especially when its the Rams. No offense means no wins for them. 2-3
VIKINGS over Falcons 24-3
More stupidity coming from me as the Falcons got absolutely demolished. I counted on Tavaris Jackson making mistakes and he did throw a pick…but then again when you’ve got Adrian Peterson running around all over the place it makes life much easier. Joey Harrington pulled a Joey Harrington. Decent stats (23/32 for 199 yards) but zero TD’s and 2 INTs. Classic pro Joey. Plus he got sacked 6 times. I blame the Falcons O-Line, no protection for the QB isn’t going to translate to any success. Apparently redemption doesn’t exist. World 2, Falcons 0. 2-4
Patriots over JETS 38-14
Hey remember when the Jets were supposed to be ‘the team’ that could hang with the Patriots? Me neither. The sensei just absolutely put the protoge through hell and back and the Patriots showed just how scary they can be. Tom Brady has got to be in heaven right about now. He got to hit Wes Welker six times and Randy Moss nine times. Speaking of Moss, good lord did he make his return. The question is are people going to ignore Moss’s stay in Oakland just like everyone forgets that Dominique Wilkins played for the Clippers, Celtics, Magic and Spurs. With Brady on his game, a strong D and the best coach in the biz…how can the Pats fall? Pennington actually didn’t play a bad game (16/21, 167 yards, 2 TDs) but Thomas Jones couldn’t get anything going and the Pats had too much going for them. 3-5
REDSKINS over Dolphins 16-13
That hail mary at the end of the game was sick. Had Randle-El been able to catch that…wow. Other than that I’m not sure what else can be said. They both played like the Dolphins and Redskins except they just happened to be playing against each other. Portis looked good, Randle-El looked great. Both Trent Green and Jason Campbell were serviceable. Home team pulled out one of those even steven games. 4-6
Titans over JAGUARS 13-10
The Titans absolutely ran over Jacksonville. I don’t think anyone would have guessed Chris Brown would have had 175 yards
running on the Jags D. And I don’t think anyone would have guessed Lendale White would have added 66. Jacksonville’s uncharacteristic lack of D is why they lost this game. Add to that the fact that their run attack got shut down and its a blessing they only lost by three. The Madden Curse has yet to strike but Vince failing to get a 100 yards passing isn’t a good sign at all. 4-6
CHARGERS over Bears 14-3
San Diego found a way to win without having LT have to go off. If word went out that LT was going to rush for 25 yards everyone and their mom would have bet the house on the Bears. The Chargers have to feel good in that way. Antonio Gates went off though. The Bears have to feel good that they shut LT down and held the Chargers to 14 points. However their offense is in shambles. You can’t turn the ball over 4 times and expect to beat anyone, not even in Madden. Cedric Benson was supposed to show that he could handle the show on his own…he didn’t. Rex Grossman was supposed to show that he was improved…he didn’t. I’m not sure the Chargers went out and won this game as much as the Bears just lost it. So glad I used common sense over the redemption theme which failed miserably. 5-7
SEAHAWKS over Buccaneers 20-6
I have to talk about this game? I’d rather talk about Britney Spears. If no one saw the VMAs…you didn’t miss much of her comeback. Whoever was the moron who had her go out in stiletto boots and a little slutty outfit should be shot. She had two kids…she’s self-conscious. You could tell she wasn’t letting loose because she was afraid she’d jiggle in all the wrong places. It was just sad. To think in middle school me and Coup almost died cause we thought we saw her underwear in concert. Now she’s going through the motions with two babies. What a sad world. Oh yeah, again Seahawks are good and Tampa Bay isn’t. 6-8
Lions over RAIDERS 36-21
I’m impressed the Lions had two turnovers and blew a 17-point lead but found a way to win. They definitely would have lost this game by at least a couple TD’s last year. The Raiders can’t be happy that their defense gave up 36 points, including 19 in the fourth quarter. 87 and a TD from Tatum Bell is just what the Lions need and if they can get that consistently their offense will be yucky. Year of Roy Williams? Decent game but it was Shaun McDonald and Calvin Johnson who stole the show. 7-9
COWBOYS over Giants 45-35
Who would have thought the shootout of the opening week was going to be between the Cowboys and Giants. This is me eating crow for the 15th straight game. Giants almost came back and won it in the fourth quarter had it not been for that Homo to Hurd hookup that sealed the deal. Romo had 4 TD’s and one pick…when he isn’t making mistakes he’s awesome. But we all know that he has two sides and that karma is still going to pay him back for dumping Carrie Underwood. TO put his money where his mouth is again with the 2 TD’s but how about Jason Witten? Plaxico might get fantasy player of the week. Best game of the week I’d say. Too bad I was wrong. 7-10
Entering tomorrow nights two showdowns I’m an abysmal 7-7 while Coup is 10-4. Hopefully the Cards can get me one back tomorrow night.