2010 Mock Lottery

“Once again back is the incredible”

As many of you may (or may not) know tonight is the 2010 NBA Lottery, one of the more underrated events in the NBA. It has everything you could ask for: drama, mystery, comedy and sports wrapped into one. It’s one of those events that you can get into whether your team is involved in it or not. Although…it’s much more stressful when your team is involved. Believe me, I think 90% of Blazer Nation were complete emotional wrecks in the buildup to the 2007 Lottery. In recent years, ESPN has turned the unintentional humor/entertainment up another notch by bringing the top 2-3 teams representatives on stage so we can all see their raw emotions. Myself, I have always been captivated by the Lottery. Growing up as a kid I thought the ping-pong balls were fun and always wanted to play with the machines. As I grew older, it was the reactions of GMs or teams randomly sending players to represent them. The mystique surrounding the envelopes always gets me.

(And yes I will use any excuse to fit a Public Enemy lyric into a blog post. For more nonsense and my lottery picks click ‘Continue Reading’ after the jump.)

The 2010 Lottery marks the first sign of the off-season and kicks off the draft speculation. Mock drafts can actually be….well they can be ‘more accurate’ than before but that’s just because everyone will know the actual order. This lottery could have an impact on free agency, coaching searches, etc. For instance it could have a major impact on the league…if say New Jersey gets the #1 pick. And that’s all I’m going to say because I’m trying to avoid speculating about you-know-who.

Speaking of the Nets, they come in with the best chance of picking up the #1 spot. Unfortunately for them, since 1990 only three teams with the highest (or best) chances of getting the #1 pick have actually come out of the Lottery with the #1 pick. New Jersey in 1990, Cleveland in 2003 and Orlando in 2004. Another sad blow to the Nets fans.

Onto my ridiculous attempt to predict the order of the NBA Lottery. I have no ping pong balls, I have no fancy machines, I am no John Hollinger and I have no crazy statistics to back me up. What do I have? Conspiracy theories, pre-conceived notions and my devious and devilish thoughts. Call me the Papa Shango of NBA Draft Lotteries. This is the third year I’ve done this and in the past I have been way off. Last year I got 9 of the 14 correct which sounds a lot better than it really is considering you get handed about 6-7. So I know you’re asking ‘Man why do you even do this?’ Because one day I will get them all right and be really, really cool on the internet for like a day. Here is what I think may happen in a few short hours:

New Jersey
Golden State
Los Angeles
Sacramento
Minnesota
Washington
Detroit
Philadelphia
Utah
Indiana
New Orleans
Memphis
Toronto
Houston

So here is how my conspiracy theories worked: the first 7 hardly ever change so I thank history for that one. I swapped Detroit and Philly because a) it sounded like it could happen and b) the Lottery Gods are still punishing Dumars for his Darko selection. Basically I treated that like when you see you put ‘D’ on three straight answers on a test and had to switch one of them up because there is no way that is happening. And if you haven’t changed an answer based on a pattern than you are a dirty liar. I gave Washington the #6 spot because they have the highest odds to end up there and because there is no way Stern is rewarding that franchise just yet. Never forget the finger guns people. The worst Minnesota could do is #5 so I put them there, again going to the fictional Lottery Gods who will never forgive him for that Rubio/Flynn abomination. Suck it, Kahn. Even though I know it would be entertaining to watch them not pick John Wall.

Sacramento got #4 because I couldn’t put them above any of the rest. The top 3 was a wee bit harder. First off I realized that I had forgotten to put the Clippers anywhere and thus placed them in my top 4 by accident. Then I did some research and realized I wasn’t terribly far off considering the Bulls went from 9 to 1 a couple years back. My inner conspiracy theorist wandered into thinking ‘John Wall + cap space = LeBron’, but I couldn’t go any further because they just got the #1 pick LAST YEAR. Unless they hired Pat Williams, there is no way they go back-to-back. New Jersey has the biggest market, a brand spanking new Russian owner, Jay-Z, Brooklyn We Go Hard and speculation of LeBron. Golden State has had some torture of late, a lot of it self-inflicted as the days of ‘We Believe’ seem so far away. They are in the #6 TV market in the country, play one of the more entertaining styles of basketball and have an amazing fanbase. Ultimately, I had to sellout and go with the Nets. As far fetched as it is, you have to do something to get that team selling tickets. Let’s watch all the Nets fans do the John Wall Dance in about 3 hours.